I'm a recreational drug user.

If your partner's not cool with it.

I've had partners before be like, "I'm not really into smoking or the smell and stuff like that." And to be honest with you, I'm not with them. I'm not necessarily trying to be with someone who isn't on the same—

Not the same level—

It's like you want to smoke a blunt in your apartment and they don't like the smell of it and it's like you want to hang out with them but also you don't want them to be annoyed or feel uncomfortable.

Right, exactly. So leave.

I think I would also probably tell them that I'm super OCD. I definitely, really like to have things my own way. As soon as I make a mess, I usually clean it up. As I'm cooking, I'm usually cleaning it up. I just like to have everything orderly. I probably reorganize my closet multiple times a month. Yeah. I think I just be upfront and be like, that's something about myself that most people probably aren't very similar to, or it might turn them off a little bit that I'm constantly trying to keep the vibe right.

Some people are just like, "Okay, like chill the fuck down. Like, it's fine if that rice crispy wrapper’s on the floor," whereas I literally will walk up and throw it away. I have friends who recognize it in me and they'll let me do my own thing because they know if I don't do it—if we're hanging out or I'm setting something up, I'm cooking, whatever—I will not have a panic attack or freak out. I'm so bottled up. I won't emotionally tell you what I'm thinking, but inside I'll literally be like, "Ahh!"

Right, that’s how it always starts.

Oh, she had a problem with you smoking weed?

She never smoked?

I’m not just going to stop one day.

Right. She’s your first girlfriend.

Turns out that not everyone is speaking the truth. One in five people say that they are keeping a major secret from their spouse. Just one of many reasons that it's important to communicate directly.

There were warning signs.

You kidding me? One of the things that was attractive to me about this girl: we go out to Wendy's—

You were in my car, I’ll never forget this. I order my order like a fucking pro, right? "Number two, extra mayo, light lettuce, Dr. Pepper, light ice. And also I want to do the dollar add on for five nuggets. I look over to Nicole and you just had a fucking like Steve Martin ordering coffee in LA story, like "I'll take a half cab, double decaf with a double whip—" You literally were like, "I'll take a double stack, add the triple, do this, carry the one, fries on top." You had a whole fucking Wendy's order that you just fucking knew.

And then I was like, "Fucking hot chick eats Wendy's? Oh, okay."

I wish that I knew that sometimes my wife just gets a little jumbled. So what she wants to say, she doesn't say. So she might be like, "Hey, could you hand me that paper towel?" And then you'll handle the paper towel. And then she’s like, “I'm sorry. I meant the fork." And you're like, “You know, you just said—" She'll just tell me to do something—you don't say what you're thinking.

I've never met someone in my entire life that has a harder time closing cabinets and drawers. Every time I walk into a room it's as if paranormal activity three is being filmed and everything is open. Everything is open. It's just the easiest thing to do.

Everybody keeps some secrets for themselves and that's okay, but the truth about you that your partner needs to know is whatever you think is the most important thing about you. You can't hide the most important thing about you from somebody you're going to have an intimate relationship with. So when people hide the truth about what they truly want in life, whether or not they want a marriage or not, whether or not they want children or not, what they want to do in terms of having a job or maybe taking a step back and being a stay at home, those are most of the common things that come up that can wreck a relationship later if that wasn't discussed in the beginning.

I'm Dr. Judy and this has been "Well, In My Opinion."