How to Support Your Partner During a Career Change
Whether your partner has chosen to leave their job for greener pastures or experienced a layoff, the loss of income can be a terrifying proposition that can strain even the strongest partnership.
However, if your marriage can weather the changing tide, the financial and emotional benefits of a fulfilling career can lead to a happier relationship that will eventually include financial stability.
Career changes are common
People change jobs for various reasons, but over the past 18 months, the major culprit has been COVID-19. During the pandemic, millions of workers found themselves sitting on the couch either temporarily or without near future job prospects. While these massive jobless totals are without recent precedent, it's more or less inevitable for the average adult: Statistically speaking, nearly half of all workers will change their careers at about age 39.
Even more startling, 78 percent of employees who "job hop"—moving from one company to another every one to two years—report increasing their salaries way more than if they had stayed the course at their original position. Typically these workers are interested in making more money and express a desire to find more fulfilling work.
While a financial strain can lead to some hard choices, the truth is that money comes and goes, but the bond you have with your partner is priceless.
The need for fulfilling work is a keystone to workplace happiness. And being unhappy at your place of work will undoubtedly impact your home life.
When I came home and declared my need for a change, my partner was rightfully skeptical: I was always looking for "something better." However, once this career shift happened, I no longer came home angry, overworked and depressed. It took time to regain financial stability, but it was worth the temporary strain for long-term peace of mind.
Supporting your partner
The average worker will shift careers five to seven times in their lives, so even if you manage to avoid the pandemic layoffs, it's likely you, your partner or both will go through this shift. Making sure both of you have ample support from one another is critical to maintaining relationship stability.
It's understandable in this situation to be scared, and that fear can take many forms, including anger. If news of a partner's layoff, conversations about them quitting a job, or their expressing frustration with the job search sparks anger, it's probably best you walk away from the conversation and regroup.
It's totally fine to take the time you need to process this information, but eventually, you need to communicate your feelings.
A two-way street
Supporting your partner is a two-way street. While you're out supporting the family, it can be understandable to resent your partner's job-free situation, but the reality is your partner may be living in fear of failure.
Your partner needs to know you support their goals, but it's also important your partner understands what you're going through. Do not hide your feelings, and be sure to share your anxieties without taking them out on your partner.
Returning the favor
Statistically speaking, you will one day change your career. How you handle your partner's situation is essential to your future career change, too. It might sound selfish, but this should be how you process any situation with your partner. When your partner is experiencing a difficult time, think about how you would want your partner to react if you were in the same position.
A strong partnership will outlast any career, mortgage or car loan. While a financial strain can lead to some hard choices, the truth is that money comes and goes, but the bond you have with your partner is priceless.
If your partner is unhappy in their career, don't let the feeling linger and destroy the life you've built together. You might be happily surprised what a career change can bring for both of you.