Science Explains Why Your Penis Curves (and Why Cardi B Might Like That)
Hey penis owners, when was the last time you looked down at your dick? Like, really looked at it. Have you thought about its sway? Examined the way it hangs to the left or right, or pulsates up or down when erect, making its curvature distinctly, irrefutably known?
More to the point, you might wonder why exactly does your penis curve—scientifically speaking? How does it choose that path? And does it matter?
If these questions regularly occupy your brain at the urinal, you're far from alone, according to Seth Cohen, M.D., assistant professor at New York University's Department of Urology, who specializes in erectile dysfunction, penile curvature and Peyronie's disease (we'll get to that).
"Men are peno-centric," Cohen said with admirable understatement. "They're very focused on what's going on with their penis.”
But men who worry about the tilt or bend in their penis are usually fretting unnecessarily. Every male is born with a specific shape and size to their penis, and no two look the same (unless they belong to identical twins), Cohen explained.
Perfectly straight dicks are less common than you might assume: Roughly 10 to 20 degrees off-kilter is considered "normal," Cohen said. (More normal than, say, if your nose slanted 20 degrees, an anatomical mystery for which the medical community doesn't have a clear answer.)
But because men spend so much precious time thinking about their packages, they sometimes find problems where there aren't any.
"Unfortunately, with porn and Google and all these things, there seems to be a 'normal' penis look, but there's no such thing," Cohen said, adding that many of his patients first notice differences in their relative arc when comparing themselves to online porn performers and thinking, "Well, my penis doesn't look like that."
Every male is born with a specific shape and size to their penis, and no two look the same.
That said, there are more serious conditions involving penile curvature. Some babies are born with chordee, a tethering on the bottom of the penis that causes it to curve down and may result in urethral issues. Chordee is often noticed at birth and can be promptly fixed.
Then there's Peyronie's disease, when sharp curvature results from a traumatic event.
"I've seen a 45-degree angle and I've seen a 90-degree angle," Cohen said (please Google with caution).
Cohen said that in his experience, most patients don't know how the injury happened, but it can result from rough sexual or masturbatory experiences or even pelvic surgery, such as the removal of the prostate or colon in cancer patients.
During the healing process, scar tissue (or plaque) builds up inside the penis, creating a lump of tissue that's familiar to many injuries. But, in this case, "it creates a tether point" on the penis, Cohen said. Think of a circus balloon bulging out to one side and you have an idea of what happens. Peyronie's may cause penile shortening and painful erections, and it can make penetration difficult, whatever your sexual orientation—especially if the curve is extreme.
Treatment options for Peyronie's range from surgery (an invasive process that can worsen erectile dysfunction) to injected medication that "digests" the scar tissue (Xiaflex is commonly used). Traction devices can also be used to pull the penis into place over time. Without surgery, Cohen noted, you probably won't fully recover but might find adequate improvement.
But what if there's nothing to improve about your slightly crescent-shaped dick?
"Do you have to do anything? No. It's not cancer," Cohen bluntly advised. There's no larger health risk at stake than potential pain or annoyance, and you'll live fine. "I always ask, 'Does it bother your partner?' Many of them say, 'Actually, it doesn't.' Or maybe they don't even notice," he added.
One woman who does notice is Cardi B. The inimitable rapper had a No. 1 hit with the filthy feminist anthem "WAP," featuring Megan Thee Stallion, in which the artists enumerate how a man should satisfy their drenched lady parts. And they, like many other enlightened, sexually active people out there today, are decidedly unafraid of minor variations. In fact, Cardi enjoys it:
Not a garter snake, I need a King Cobra
With a hook in it, hope it lean over
Cohen, admittedly not a pop culture expert, guessed that she might be referring to the theory that dorsal penile curvature can activate the G-spot.
Meanwhile, a quick search for "curved dick" on Pornhub finds thousands of videos that emphasize the trait, mostly lustfully. One, simply titled "I Like Curved Dick," has about 86,000 views and an 88-percent approval rating as of this writing. (It's also kinda hot…)
So how's your sway? Depending on your perspective, it might look more appealing than ever.