How to Have Sex During a Heat Wave
The phrase "wet, hot summer" carries some truth. There could be a connection between higher temperatures and getting it on. Folks living in hotter climates, such as Miami and Atlanta, reported higher rates of sexual activity in a survey conducted by Trojan, the condom company.
Doing the deed during higher-than-normal temperatures can also mean overheating, dehydration and discomfort in hot, cramped spaces. High heat could make you feel tired, crabby or bored.
"Most people don't want to be touched when they are hot, sweaty and uncomfortable, and they also don't want to mash their hot, sweaty bodies together during intercourse," said Laurie Mintz, Ph.D., a licensed psychologist and certified sex therapist in Florida, and the author of "Becoming Cliterate" and "A Tired Woman's Guide to Passionate Sex."
Not wanting sex in extreme heat also has biological underpinnings. Very high temperatures can increase stress hormones and decrease testosterone, both of which are associated with lower libido.
Research suggests that following very high temperatures, birth rates are lower nine months later. If you want to get it on during hotter temperatures, here's how to boost pleasure and comfort levels when having sex during a heat wave.
Cool down your environment
If you have A/C, use it, Mintz recommended.
"Some experts suggest the ideal temperature for sex is 69 degrees—no kidding!" Mintz said.
Don't have A/C in your digs? Then head to the garage and try enjoying sex in the car with the A/C turned up. Of course, you want to be discreet.
Mintz suggested putting bedsheets in the freezer before you engage in sexual activities. Or try ice play and rub ice cubes all over your partner's body.
"Ice play can be a fun turn-on for folks if they've not experienced it," said Tom Murray, Ph.D., a therapist based in Greensboro, North Carolina. "Use ice cubes to tantalize and titillate the partner. If not ice cubes, cold metal can be an alternative."
Experiment with different scenarios
During a heat wave, be like a chameleon. Try different sex positions and fold in new elements. For instance, engage in sexy roleplay and incorporate the heat into your erotic narratives.
Here's an example: Be the HVAC person who knocks at the front door to repair the system. Slowly take articles of clothing off as the steam builds. Or pretend you're deserted on an island and seeking refuge from the heat by indulging in some wet elements.
Higher-than-average temperatures mean you can enjoy the lack of clothing needed if you like sex outside, either daytime or nighttime, said Chelsie Reed, Ph.D., L.P.C., a mental health counselor in Arizona and the author of "Sexpert: Desire, Passion, Sensations, Intimacy and Orgasm to Indulge in Your Best Sex Life." "Think: in a pool, pond or waterfall, or get to play with ice on every inch and in every crevice you want to cool down," Reed said. "Use single ice cubes across your partner's body. Insert an ice cube made with clean water. Then have your partner enjoy finding your cool oasis in your mouth or loins."
In lieu of ice, consider a cooling lubricant, Reed added.
"This also works similarly to ice," she said.
Be mindful of lube woes
One concern that might not be on your radar during a heat wave is the fact that fans can dry out water-based lubrication way too soon after application.
"Water-based lubricants, unlike silicone-based lubricants, dry out when exposed to airflow," Murray said. "Don't be afraid to add more or use saliva to reconstitute the lube when needed. It's always best to apply more before you think you need it." To avoid friction burns, make sure you use plenty of lubricant inside and even on legs, arms and your butt, Reed advised. And as the combination of heat and moisture raises the odds of getting a yeast infection, always be sure to urinate and wipe down body openings, she suggested.
Try low-contact sexual positions
If sweaty, body-on-body sex isn't for you during higher temps, consider positions that require less skin contact. Murray's hot-weather position suggestions include:
- Corkscrew. You need a bench, bed or couch for this one. The receiving partner leans on the edge of the furniture, resting on their hip and forearm, and squeezes their thighs together. The penetrating partner, while standing, straddles the receiver and enters from behind.
- Classic cowgirl. The sex partner who is penetrating lies on their back. The other partner then gets on top, facing their partner while squatting and "riding" them.
- Reverse cowgirl. The partner who is on top doesn't sit face to face with the penetrating partner. Rather, they turn around in the opposite direction.
- Tabletop. Find a sturdy table that is ideally waist-high. The receiving partner sits on the table's edge with their legs slightly spread. The penetrating partner stands in front of them. They should be facing each other for either anal or vaginal sex.
Remember: Sex doesn't always need to include penetration. Go for low-body contact activities, such as oral sex, side-by-side masturbation or the use of remote-control vibrators, Mintz explained.
Potential complications aside, aim to treat the heat as a bonus and not as an obstacle, Reed said.
"Be creative and play with the heat," she said.
The bottom line
When things turn hot and sticky outside, don't neglect sexy time with your partner. Get creative. Flip on the air conditioning, try a little roleplay, bring on the ice or cool water, and get down and dirty in new sex positions. You may not want the heat wave to end.
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