Learning everything there is to know about your genitals can feel like a daunting task, but things become especially tricky when we add new people and partners into the mix.

Despite ongoing fixation with length and girth, penises come in all shapes, sizes, shades and variations. There are online mini-dictionaries dedicated to naming their differences: from giant "anacondas" to short, chubby "chodes," there’s a plethora of penile vocabulary to choose from. Yet the cheeky, colloquial language we use betrays a lack of fundamental knowledge. Think of the many myths that persist—"big feet, big meat"—and it becomes clear the cultural obsession with "one-eyed trouser snakes" doesn’t translate into hard facts.

As a visitor, this combination of factors can make your life pretty difficult, so consider this guide your handy, accessible companion as you get to know your partner’s genitalia. With the help of urologists, experts and firsthand knowledge, it’s time to break down everything you need to know about the penis.